OK, let's do this (rolling up my sleeves):
ASSUMPTION #1: "whole world is against me"
When feelings become overwhelming, it almost seems as if the world lost its colors.
Everything sort of fades away and it's hard to "cope with it".
QUESTION #1. Is it really the "whole world"?
• Or is it a large group of people?
• Or is it maybe just a small group of people?
• Is there really no one who is supporting you?
(How about me answering this question?)
There are always people around you who are supportive.
It's up to you to refocus on them instead of those who are the "source" of your suffering.
ASSUMPTION #2: "cope with life"
When we suffer, we feel that the best we can do is to "cope with it".
However, coping doesn't change things in our life.
QUESTION #2: What can you do right now to change your situation?
I don't mean changing your whole life situation.
If you can think of something, good on you!
What I mean is:
• What can you do NOW to change your current situation?
• If you're sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself, can you pick yourself up and go for a walk?
• If you're lying in bed feeling bad, could you maybe go and meet a friend?
When we suffer, the most important step is to zoom all the way into the present moment and take THE NEXT RIGHT STEP.
Don't care about everything else and your future life, for now.
Your "future life" consists of all the now moments that are between NOW and the future NOW.
Take 1 action step NOW.
What is it?
ASSUMPTION #3: cope with life when "you feel"
People mistakenly assume they are to cope with life when they first need to deal with their feelings.
Put 100 different people in front of a situation and then ask them what they just experienced...
you'll get 100 different answers.
They describe different things.
They notice different things.
They feel different things.
QUESTION #3: What is the name of the feeling you feel right now?
Is there more than 1 feeling you can name?
When people say: "I've got anger", they are wrong.
When you're angry, it is not YOU who's got anger.
Anger got you.
You are "possessed by" anger.
But, when you name your feelings, you "objectify" it.
Ideally you write it down on a piece of paper.
What happens is that the emotion doesn't reside in you anymore, but it changes its "residence" into the description.
It becomes an object.
Not in you anymore.
On the paper.
Once the emotion is not in you, but outside of you, you're in control again.
It is now you who's got the emotion.
Emotion doesn't have you anymore.
Once you've got the emotion, you can do something with it.
What can you do with objectified emotion?
Many things.
• You can draw it (works for many children) and thus removing it from your body
• You can talk to it and ask it for its intention (to reveal what is underneath the emotion)
• You can "tap it" away from your body
How do you tapping?
Use 2-3 fingers to tap specific points on your body.
The most common tapping sequence for emotions is:
• At the beginning of your eyebrows
• Under the eyes
• Under your armpits
• At the beginning of your collarbone
Tap vigorously, at least 15 times.
You WILL notice the difference as the emotion will simply leave your body.
Now, if none of these work, make sure to contact me.
I'm happy to assist you.
We are here to help each other.
There's no other species that can do it for us.
